A long, long time ago, I've read something that goes like, "Get a job you want and you'll never have to work a single day of your life." Even though that may have been years ago, I can still recall that at that precise moment of my life, I understood exactly what that adage meant.
Nonetheless, lessons learned are almost always forgotten if not incorporated into daily existence. That understanding I had is no exception; throughout my professional life, I've not thought about doing something I like. It was always about what I value at any given time.
I accepted my first job since it pays well, long story short. But no, it wasn't just about the money, I told myself before I began working there. My first work was something in line with my interest - writing. However, things proved to be not to my personal preferences, for even though I was basically writing stuff the whole day, there were other matters that had to be taken into consideration.
And so, I resigned from there. My focus shifted; money was not everything, career growth was deemed of higher priority. I got a job and tried to become the professional I envisioned myself to be. But there was a catch - I'd be honed into a good white-collar worker but how that would be done will largely depend on the company's needs.
Company decisions were made, and I was tossed about like a baseball among warming-up pitchers and catchers (at least that's how I feel). Still I persevered - bills were due and my salary is barely enough to pay them. I endured the things I thought I couldn't.
Another shakeup, and I find myself where I am now. Some problems were indeed solved, but new ones surface to take their place. And then realization sets in, yet no answer is apparent.
I had just been going with the flow. And much like a dry leaf being tossed about by the breeze, I merely allowed my personal destiny to be shaped by unseen forces.
Yes I realize my errors, but no solution seem to be better than that which I have always known since I've read it - to get a job I like. And it's not like doing just that will be remotely possible in the light of current situations.
I just feel so helpless in the sense that I know I can do something but I can't do just that for a plethora of reasons. And yeah, I'm quite depressed right now. XD
Friday, May 30, 2008
Going with the flow
Posted by Jherskie at 1:07 AM 0 comments
Labels: Awakening Awareness, Sketches
Thursday, May 29, 2008
No title
I am not feeling well again. I dunno why I'm having this lingering feeling of dread, and I don't really like it. It may just be paranoia, or I may really be getting worried of my credit card debts. XD
Yeah, yeah, so I've splurged over the past months. I know the interests are accruing. But I needed to use those damn cards, anyway.
I'll just wait until I have a clearer mind before I post another update. Must keep this place clean, I daresay. =P
Posted by Jherskie at 1:06 AM 0 comments
Labels: Advisories
Saturday, May 24, 2008
"Where Love Doesn't Reach"
I actually no longer remember when I added that imeem app on the right sidebar. The app doesn't automatically play upon loading, and that is why I haven't been noticing it's existence in this blog. (I think I'll make the necessary adjustments when I find out how) =P
Just moments ago, I noticed SniperAngel's comment in my chatbox and it dawned upon me that I should blog about it. But where should I start?
Owkay, first of all the imeem app plays "Where Love Doesn't Reach," or "Unfathomed Reminiscence", which is one of the numerous background music (BGMs) of the game, Final Fantasy IX. And unless my memory fails me again, I think the BGM first played shortly after the Kingdom of Alexandria was devastated by Bahamut (which was being controlled by the main antagonist, Kuja). As such, the theme is somewhat sombre and sad. (C'mon, give it a try if you haven't yet).
The music piece is very much emotional, yet there is something uplifting about it. I think this is why I'm drawn to it. As you see, the moment that Alexandria was destroyed is one of the several greatest losses for the main character, Princess Garnet Til Alexandros. Well, if you are ruling one kingdom and that kingdom is destroyed before your very eyes, what would you feel?
But even through the sadness and despair, there still exists hope for a better future. I believe this is the focal point upon which people should rally to realize some great truths in the midst of tragedies.
Calamities can really bring people down to their knees in many ways. With the great loss and the trauma, people are exposed to pain, and with that pain comes weakness. Ironically, the only way to deal with those weaknesses is to become stronger.
Of course, people weakened by the loss of a loved one may not be able to muster their inner strength just to overcome their sadness. But they can become strong by drawing their strength from others.
This is the lesson that can be learned during times of great hardships: that people should be united to make it through the worst ordeals. I'd also add that extending assistance doesn't necessarily translate to giving out monetary aid. Most of the time, survivors need moral and emotional support just to move on - and those giving a hand should, more than anything else, also give out their hearts and lend their strength.
Zidane and the others FFIX characters helped Garnet to stand up and carry on by allowing her to go at her own pace while at the same time supporting her up to the very end. I believe that everyone should learn from that, and try to apply it whenever possible.
Collective courage - this, for me, is what the theme, Where Love Doesn't Reach / Unfathomed Reminiscence is about.
Note: Updated post and fixed the app to auto-play upon loading. XD
Posted by Jherskie at 9:18 PM 1 comments
Labels: Recollections, Sketches
Friday, May 23, 2008
Just another advisory
For the past few days I've been obsessed to finish all the major sidequests in Final Fantasy IX (yeah, yeah, that 7-year old game made by Square Enix for the Playstation gaming console). I have been playing the game for the three or four months already (since, as a gamer, I am keen on doing every subquest), and I have already finished it weeks ago. However, there is but one particular, optional boss monster that I had wanted to finish off ever since I started playing this game - Ozma.
Just a little FYI, Ozma is the hardest boss to beat in the game, but fighting him is not necessary to reach the game's end. As a matter of fact, it is an altogether different route just to get to him (but not a deviation from the main story arc, though).
So, for the past few weeks since I first finished the FFIX, I had been gunning to bring Ozma down. It became quite an obsession for me; that is why I hadn't been trying to get myself to write down anything for this blog.
But I was able to finish him off a few hours ago (although not before being defeated a few times) . =P And with that out of my system, I think I can go back to regularly updating this particular corner of the web. (^^,)
Posted by Jherskie at 2:38 PM 0 comments
Labels: Advisories
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Maximize and minimize
I've heard someone say that if life gives you lemons, make a lemonade. In other words, try to make the most of the things in your hands and use it to make the world a better place.
Or something like that. =P
Owkay, I'm a full-pledged engineer and I bet many of those who know me would say that I ought to be maximizing everything I can because maximizing something for maximizing's sake is what every engineer should live for. Pardon me for using the word 'maximizing' three times in the past sentence, but I think I should etch that more into my consciousness.
For the past months, my focus hadn't been so well that I had barely minimum usage of the things I could have taken more from. I'd rather not list those things down lest this post get longer than necessary, but I think I'll just settle on what knocked me back to my senses. And that thing that reminded me to get back on track was...
A childish game of "Luxor: Wrath of Seth"!
I was playing the frikkin' game just a few weeks ago when I realized that the reason why I was failing to complete the levels was because I wasn't maximizing my resources. Many a times, I'd want to have a red ball whenever I have blue or green, when in fact I could use the ball in hand to prepare for nice combos! Or if I have what I want, I'd just shoot the ball just to shoot it without thinking about other better uses I could put the ball for.
As I learned to maximize each ball that comes into my hand (and get to the higher levels of the game), realization dawned upon me that I should put the lesson into real life. F*k with the lemonade, just sell the lemons! Then you'd have the money for whatever you want to buy. =P
Posted by Jherskie at 10:21 PM 0 comments
Labels: Awakening Awareness, Recollections, Sketches
In Between
I'd love to complain about the weather, but I won't be doing so. First point, it's useless. Second, you can't control the weather. Third, rain is good in the long run. XD
Owkay, the onslaught of the rain and the past storm is making me gloomy enough to keep me from writing. As I've said in a previous post, I'm already getting burned out at work and the little time I got left of any day is allocated to sleep (I'm either sleeping or playing with my PSP). =P
However, I've decided to take up my pen and begin writing again (well, figuratively). The thing with rain is that even if it makes me gloomy, it awakens the writer in me even if I'm in the midst of writers' block. That'll be the fourth reason, I guess, why I won't complain about the weather.
Everything nowadays is in-between: the season is shifting from my beloved summer to the rainy season, and my writing skill is swinging forth between hyperactivity and inactivity. Between that point of hyperactivity and the opposite end, is the position I'm currently in. It seems I have to push myself to write.
And so, I did.
Posted by Jherskie at 8:47 PM 0 comments
Labels: Sketches
Sunday, May 11, 2008
The Traveler's Realization
A rant post I made several weeks ago had been dedicated to how fed up I've gotten with traveling (by bus, that is). Indeed, I thought my love for traveling had been blown by the winds to the four corners of the world, never to come back to me.
But no, I was mistaken. Deep in my heart, I am a traveler - and I long for journeys - nothing can change that. Perhaps it was the boring bus rides that made me hate my usual travels, but I think I know better now.
It was during the past trip to Boracay Island when I've rediscovered my innate love for traveling. The plane ride from Clark to Caticlan airports (my first, as a matter of fact), enlivened my interests in public transportation. I fully realized that I do love flying. ^^,
If not for the not-so-pleasant sensations brought about by the equalization of inner ear air pressure with the environmental pressure (or whatever that is technically called), I'd say that flying is something I'd wanna try out on a daily basis. =P
Posted by Jherskie at 9:39 PM 0 comments
Labels: Jherskie's Journeys, Sketches
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Welcome2dPhils
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the tropical islands of the Philippines; expect the weather to be as good as how bad it can get. (If that doesn't sound right, never mind) =P
No, we're not resuming to regular programming (so to speak). This post's another one of those advisories wherein I'm telling you guys that I'm not posting anything, yet. ~_~
Crazy weather + work = no_time_to(update)
The frequent thunderstorms that occur around here from the afternoons to late in the evening are forcing me not to use my computer, for safety reasons. No, it's not just the matter of me using WiFi internet by Smart BRO (hence, the transmitter atop our roof that is very much welcoming lightning strikes). This place is naturally attractive to that natural electric phenomenon because of the 20meter-high self-supporting tower of a service provider's cellsite. My old PC had fallen victim a few years ago, and I'm not eager to allow my new one to meet the same fate.
I'm also not too sure that I'd be updating over the weekend. But please do drop by every now and then, I'm still active, y'know.
Posted by Jherskie at 11:36 AM 0 comments
Labels: Advisories
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Bora: Day 2 and 3
Alright, I'm running out of creativity so I'm leaving this post's title as you see it. This update's gonna be straightforward, anyway.
A previous blog entry is entitled, "Been there, done that", right? Our second day at Boracay was spent doing the usual stuff that tourists do there - food trips, chilling out, trying out the banana boats, touring the island, snorkeling, and swimming! ^_^ (I suppose we could have done more if we had more money to spend, but us poor employees had barely enough to go back to our office.) T-T
First of all, we were tired from the first day so that we woke up on the second day quite late in the morning. We hurriedly ate, taking advantage of the supposed-complimentary breakfast and stuffing ourselves much. Soon after, we fixed our things and started out for the beach, aiming to try out the island tour first. However, a few of our other companions proposed to give the banana boat a shot first, which we did. =P
In a nutshell, the experience was worth the amount we paid for the ride. Yes, you really need to try it out yourself as no words can suffice to convey how enjoyable the banana boat is. I'm leaving it at that - the banana boat's worth it, give it a shot, too, whenever and wherever you can. =)
We were supposed to go on the island tour next, but since everyone got exhausted from the banana boat, we decided to rest and take pictures instead (this proved to be not a good idea, since island tours should be best done during the morning as we've learned later). After posing in the sand several times, we noticed that it was almost lunch time so we headed back to the hotel. The food was really good, and we filled our stomachs to their bursting point, hehe.
Too bad, we felt sleepy immediately after. So, there was no other option left but to give in. At around 3PM, we woke up and gathered everyone interested in the island tour. We hurriedly sought the people we contracted earlier for the tour, and we began the boat trip. Oh, we rode this boat (picture taken by one of my officemates):
The tour was also nice, and the boatman acted as a bit of tour guide, too. He even pointed out Manny Pacquiao's alleged resort (it really looked wonderful even from afar). We had a brief stopover at Puka beach (wherein we bought some souvenirs), but we didn't have enough time to visit the caves. The tour resumed, and we came at that part of the sea around the island where the waves were not so gentle. ~_~
Towards the end of the tour, we stopped by at that rather rough portion of the sea to snorkel. That part I didn't enjoy much because of the waves (and to think it was snorkeling that I was looking forward to the most). The boatman said that the waves are calmer during the morning, and we really should have done it first (*sob*). T-TWe came back to our starting point shortly before 6PM, and we took our time enjoying the sunset. And by enjoying, I meant that we took more pictures, hehe. Also, we tried making sand castles! Owkay, not really. We just played around with the sand (what kind of game, I leave to your imagination *wink*). Oh, here's a sunset picture I took myself (using my handy cellphone camera, of course):
When it was too dark to stay in the beach, we decided to move to the pool and we killed time swimming. We stayed by the pool until it was time for dinner, and we went back there after eating. Talking about maximizing the free use of the pool, hehe. =P
As our flight on the third and last day was at 11:50AM, we woke up quite early. I was actually hoping to try out some fruit shakes before we leave, but we ended up swimming on the beach instead until it was time for us to prepare to leave. =P
The trip home wasn't really enjoyable, partly because I really wanted to extend my stay, but mostly because of several inconveniences (like our flight being delayed). Still, the trip as a whole was fun even if it was a bit short. Anyway, I'm ending this post with a picture of Boracay Island. 'Til next time! :P
Posted by Jherskie at 5:35 PM 0 comments
Labels: Jherskie's Journeys, Places
Thursday, May 1, 2008
It's May Again
It's the first day of May here in the country, and I'm betting there are lots of rallies somewhere in the capital, Manila. Yeah, it's Labor Day and there must surely be lots of people doing the deemed-mandatory Labor Day rallies. But no, I do not wish to talk about that here since I'm trying to keep this blog away from Philippine politics as much as I can.
Anyway, I've noticed that my last update had been six days ago. Well, I'd been too lazy to write, I admit. =P
No, actually I wasn't too lazy to update. Let's just say that my brain was too tired to spew out blog entries. My new work is taking up much of my mental capacities for the past few days, and after the daily eight-hour duty I am left only to recharge.
But I'm not complaining, though. I'm loving what I'm doing, you see. But I will have to wait for the proper moments to write blog updates, else I only put in trash in here. Hehe.
I'm still not through talking about my trip to Boracay (and I'll upload a few more pictures, too), and I'll also be blogging about my activities last weekend as well. AAAANNNDDDDD... It's May again! I just saw that the plants in our garden are in bloom even though I wasn't taking care of them much (but my parents are, hehe). For now, however, I'm left to put up this advisory so as not to lose readership. (^^,)
So, I'm now off to work! (Yeah, I'm still doing graveyard duties in my new job)
=)
Posted by Jherskie at 5:56 PM 0 comments
Labels: Advisories